The terrible, horrible, no-good, very bad day

Usually Sundays are very quiet, low-key days at our house.  This past Sunday, however, was a different story…  Usually we go to church on Sunday evenings, but last Sunday, we decided to “divide and conquer” because Brad had work to do, and I had to finish a paper. Brad decides to work in the early afternoon, and we plan to switch later in the day.

11:15 – Brad leaves to go work on a presentation at his office.  While he is gone, my plan is to take the kids to church, run by the grocery store, clean the kitchen, and put the kids down for a nap.   Although my list is ambitious, it wasn’t too unrealistic…or so I thought.

11:50 – After Isaac threw a fit about not being allowed to take Thomas the Tank Engine to church, the kids and I head to church – where we are stopped by EVERY. red. light. on the way.

12:15 – We arrive at church, late.  There is no place to sit, so we stand at the back.  The kids are reasonably well behaved, so I am thinking all is well.

1:00 – Church is over.  On our way out, Isaac tries to run away in the PARKING LOT.  I am carrying Liesl, but manage to snatch him by his upper arm and drag him, screaming, all the way to the car.  Of course, we parked in the very back because we were late, therefore many nice, church-going people get to watch me drag my screaming toddler across the parking lot.

1:15 – We’re at the grocery store (at this point, really, I should have just gone home, but I thought “Hey, it can’t get any worse!”)  All we had to get were some bagels and milk, so I’m thinking that this is doable.  I found the cart that has the “car” underneath the basket – which Isaac thinks is very cool.  You know, the cart you swore, pre-children, that you would never use.  Yes, that giant plastic cart.  I get that cart, load the kids up, and we head inside.  We get our things, and head towards the checkout.  Before we can get there, a woman with another cart, manages to run into me and my “car-cart”.  How do you miss the person with the giant blue plastic car attached to her shopping cart?!

She pushes my cart into a display of granola.  A slew of granola containers fall to the ground, and several open, and spill granola all over the floor.  The other woman just walked away, leaving me with the granola mess, and a loud toddler saying “Uh-oh.  What happened?  Did you knock it over?  There is a big mess.”  Extremely embarrassing, as there are plenty of people around me.  Thankfully, we manage to check out without further incidents, and I also buy two small pieces of dark chocolate thinking “I deserve this”.

On our way out of the grocery store, Isaac throws yet another fit because he has to get out of his “car”.  Of course, I had a parking space right in front of the store, so plenty of people get to witness the meltdown.  He screams and cries so loudly while I am loading Liesl into the car that several people come over to me and ask if he is ok.  I am mortified.  We finally get into the car and out of the parking lot.  Isaac screams most of the way home.

1:45 – we arrive back at home.  I put Isaac down for a nap, and Liesl is asleep in her car seat.  I now take a mommy time-out, which consists of a reheated leftover cup of coffee from breakfast, and the two pieces of chocolate I bought at the grocery store.

My standards have dropped to a new low.

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3 Responses to The terrible, horrible, no-good, very bad day

  1. Becca says:

    Just found you via Simple Kids. When we moved to Austin my husband had just finished his PhD and I was still finishing mine. We have a three month old too! So many coincidences! We are usually dragging a screaming child across our church parking lot too, it’s just that time of day I think.

  2. Martha Coffey says:

    I bet you didn’t get much out of that church service. That is sooo funny. Too bad there wasn’t someone at the grocery store with a video camera.

  3. Pauli says:

    This is Pauli from the other Est Quod Est site. Great story! One of our toddlers (we have 5 boys) ran out naked out the front door and someone in the neighborhood freaked and called the cops. The cop pulled in right behind the plumber who had just showed up. Anyway this kind of crap happens to my wife all the time. My 3rd son vomited all over at Friendly’s several years back—so don’t sweat the granola.

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